


shirogane

by cosmoscrow



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Family Feels, Family Fluff, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, LET ME HAVE THE SPACE DAD TROPE, Mild Angst, also anxiety attack, broganes, i am weak to found family trope, i cried a bit typing this??, listen guys this is just pure indulgence, shiro is the ultimate space dad i do not accept anything else, there is like one mention of blood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-27
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-12-20 12:52:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11921310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cosmoscrow/pseuds/cosmoscrow
Summary: Takashi Shirogane aka Shiro, 25 years old, former Space Pilot and Gladiator, dead tired and haunted by nightmares. Luckily, his team of colourful ragtags provide a welcome distraction. And maybe even healing.[or wherein Shiro is a Dad, Brother and Husband all together.]





	shirogane

**Author's Note:**

> current mood: highkey tired af seeing my mentally ill, disabled, grown ass asian man being turned into one big shipping canoe, pls appreciate him more, yall are not loving him like you're supposed to, just let me have that one deadass cool mentally ill, disabled, asian representation in a cartoon, thanks.
> 
> SPACE DAD OR BUST.
> 
> But otherwise; hope you enjoy and take care!
> 
> PS: this takes place somewhere in Season 2, just. yanno, not that much of a train wreck.

_**I**_. Pidge has been well-known to stay up well into the early hours of the morning – or well, the space-equivalent of morning, Shiro isn't too sure. Either way, Pidge stays up late and while Shiro himself doesn't get much sleep and is a damn hypocrite, it doesn't exactly sit well with him to know that the youngest Paladin pushes herself to her limits until she literally passes out from exhaustion.

Like tonight; Shiro let's out a quiet sigh as he regards the slumped over form of the Green Paladin, softly snoring away over her laptop in the common room of the castle. Quietly, he makes his way over to her before gently nudging her awake. Pidge groggily lifts her head, drool sticking to the corner of her mouth and glasses askew on her nose.

"Hhwhat?", she slurs, hazel eyes drooping and Shiro notices the dark rings under them. He smiles softly.

"C'mon Katie, it's time for bed," He closes her laptop as Pidge slowly stands up, albeit a bit wonky. To Shiro's surprise, she extends her arms sleepily, waiting.

 _She must be really tired_ , the Black Paladin thinks but chuckles anyway as he kneels to allow Pidge to clumsily climb on his back. Checking that she sitting secure without any danger of slipping, Shiro takes the laptop and carries it and it's owner into their correct room. Pidge's door swishes open quietly and dim lights give Shiro a better view of the otherwise dark room. Carefully, he steps around the various cables and electric gadgets strewn around on the floor of the room while listening to Pidge's calm breathing near his ear.

He arrives safely at Pidge's bed and sets down the laptop on the nearest clean surface first, before he gently removes his tiny passenger into bed without jostling her too much. In an afterthought, he also removes her shoes and glasses and then tucks her in, smiling as she yawns while rubbing her eye. With his human hand, Shiro affectionately ruffles her unruly hair softly.

"Goodnight, Katie," Shiro says quietly and silently slips away towards the door, not without turning the lights lower until only the blue highlights of the castle shine dimly into the darkness. As he closes the door, he nearly misses the quiet mumble of _"Goodnight, Dad"_  while the door swishes close. Wide grey eyes stare at the closed door in front of him as Shiro's brain tries to process of what just happened.

In the end, Shiro just smiles tiredly, _melancholic_ , before making his way down the hallway for another sleepless night exploring the castle.

_(In hopes to escape those vivid nightmares – those dark memories.)_

* * *

 

 _ **II**_. The 'incident' with Pidge slowly fade away into the back of Shiro's mind in the next few days as he trained the Paladins, caught Hunk taking apart a small machinery which Coran mentioned has gone missing, did his best to placate a furious Allura yelling at Pidge through a vent for her to give the Princess back her digital diary and chastised Lance and Keith after a ridiculous bet gone wrong which ended with both of the boys getting covered in food goo. 

And that all before Dinner Time. It's safe to say that Shiro is already well exhausted but at least peace is settling back into the castle when Dinner came around.

Shiro sits down in his chair, already shovelling a good portion of food goo onto his spoon and he is halfway through chewing when he notices something amiss at the table – he looks around. Pidge and Hunk are babbling something about their newest invention, while Keith inquires the Alteans about the different levels of the Gladiator-Bots they used so often during training. Shiro set down his spoon, frowning.

"Has anyone seen Lance?"

It went quiet as five heads swivel around to look at the Black Paladin. Then, Hunk blinks owlishly before looking around franticly.

"He's not here? But he never misses dinner with us..." The engineer trails off, now obviously worried about his best friend. Allura stands up from her seat.

"Maybe we should–"

"It's fine," They watch how Shiro rises from his own seat before making his way over to the door. "I'll go look for him, perhaps he's still on the training Deck practicing his aim and just forgot the time."

He gives the group a small wave and walks down the hallway to the Training Deck, only to find that Lance isn't there. Shiro just raises his brows and turns on his heel to have a look in the Blue Lion Hangar – but just like before, no Lance in sight. Now Shiro starts to worry a little; it's not like the Blue Paladin could've gone far, and yet he isn't to be found at the places he spends most time at – _the Front Deck_.

Snapping his fingers at the smart thought, Shiro swiftly makes his way towards his last destination and as soon as he enters the Front Deck, he knows he is right. In a calm rhythm, the small holographic planets and star systems from the holographic map swirl around Shiro as he walks towards the hunched over figure of Lance. The boy is sitting on top of the small stairs, knees pulled to his chest, hood up over his head and chin on his knees as his eyes forlornly look at the small digital replica of the Earth gently spinning in front of him. Seeing the normally energetic and active boy so melancholic, _so_   _lost_ , sent an icy fist clenching around Shiro's heart. Gently, he approaches Lance.

"Hey, buddy," Shiro greets and smiles when Lance turns a little to look up at him with wide eyes. "We missed you at dinner, mind if I join you?"

Lance's blue eyes widen a bit more at the mention of dinner but then gestures to the spot next to him as if to say ' _go ahead_ '. When Shiro plants himself right next to him, he buries his chin back onto his knees.

"...sorry, I think– I think I just lost track of time..." The Blue Paladin mutters. "I was just– you know,"

He makes a vague movement with his hand towards the holographic Earth, trailing off with a small voice. Shiro just nods but watches Lance intently; he looks clearly upset but seems to make no move to say something about it. That's fine, he won't push so Shiro stays, watching the stars and planets on the map. He actually never took the time to get a good look and now that he is here, it seems like he has gained a new appreciation for it. Silence stretches on between the two of them, when Lance opens his mouth.

"Do you..." He hesitates and almost shyly looks up to Shiro. "Do you ever, ya' know...miss Earth? Miss _Home_?"

For a moment, Shiro sees the face of his mother; youthful for her age but there are the telltale signs of crowfeet in the corners of her warm, dark brown eyes, soft wrinkles if one looked close enough, all framed by straight black hair usually bound into a loose bun. She smiles as she says his name, _Takashi_.

"Yeah," He says. "Yeah I do so very much actually..."

He leans forward, elbows on his knees and manages a sad smile towards Lance.

"I take it you do too?"

He is met with glassy blue eyes, that hastily blink and Lance quickly brings the sleeve of his jacket over his eyes, trying to cover the oncoming tears. Shiro's smile turns sympathetic as he watches how the rubbing turns desperate.

"I– I, yeah of course I do, I mean–" A choked sob escapes Lance's mouth as he brings both of his arms up, burying his face in them. "I do– Crap, yeah I do, I– _I miss them so much, Shiro_."

The confession breaks the dam and Lance freely cries into the sleeves of his jacket, curling into himself as his shoulders shake with the sobs he tries to mute but can't. Shiro's heart clenches painfully – he misses his mother just as much, all her home cooked meals, the phone calls she'd make to check up on him. He can't imagine the feeling being as young as the other Paladins, millions upon millions of lightyears away from home, from family.

His human hand gently settles itself on one of Lance's shoulders as he pulls the boy against his side and lets him cry his heart out, while Lance actively welcomes the gesture, leaning into the man for comfort.

_(Shiro looks back on all the stories Lance has told about his family – of all his older siblings, his younger nieces and nephews he often took care of, of the meals his father cooked, the ocean adventures he had with his mother, how he learned how to knit and sew through his grandmother and suddenly, Shiro is very aware of how lonely Lance must've felt in a castle too big and empty for them.)_

The Black Paladin stays with the boy until his sobs turn into quiet sniffles and unfurls from his balled up state, still rubbing at his face which leaves red streaks in their wake. Shiro pats him on the back.

"Feeling better?" He asks, lip quirking a bit as Lance nods, rubbing his runny nose. The boy chuckles weakly.

"Ugh, I probably look like a mess,"

"Well," Shiro starts jokingly. "definitely not what we see every morning after you wash off your mask."

Lance huffs, shoving Shiro who barely sways but snickers instead. He reaches beneath Lance's hood and ruffles the brown hair underneath.

"C'mon buddy, I think some rest would do you good," He rises to his feet and offers Lance a hand, before hauling him up. "Hunk and Pidge will probably come over with some food."

Lance just nods, offering Shiro a watery smile before turning to walk towards the door, still sniffling as he again starts to rub at his eyes. Shiro watches him retreat and as he's about to turn towards the map again, he is hit with a sense of deja-vu.

_"Thanks, Dad."_

The man blinks, turning his head back into Lance's direction and sees the boy still tiredly rubbing at his face as he trudges out of the room. He doesn't seem to register his words, unaware of Shiro's surprised gaze on him as he rounds a corner out of Shiro's sight. He lets out a small, amused huff and then turns back towards the map, admiring the many stars and planets and galaxies. His grey eyes fall back onto the small replica of the Earth – for a moment, he just stares before reaching out and turning off the map.

* * *

 

 _ **III**_. It is one of the few quiet days in which the universe left Team Voltron unbothered for once and of course, they all immediately took advantage of that. Shiro found it nice taking a breather once in a while as he strolls down the many castle hallways – he just came back from the Royal Gardens, a room filled to the brim with otherworldly flora, a discovery made by Hunk and Lance that had the Alteans jumping in joy at the news. Every once in a while, Shiro liked to take a walk around in the garden, it reminds him of Earth, of the small vegetable garden his mother always heckled him to help out with. He enters the common room and isn't too surprised at the sight that greets him.

Lance is sitting on the back of the circular couch, happily braiding Allura's long hair while said Princess is sitting comfortably between his long legs, gesturing with her hands once in a while as she talks. Next to her sat Keith, slumped back into the cushions, arms placed over the edge of the couch while man-spreading as far as he could and Shiro honestly wonders if this boy has retained any sense of manners the man had drilled into him. To Allura's left was Hunk with a strange gadget in his lap that he'd been previously poking around in with Pidge's short legs dangling over his shoulders as she sat right behind him, like Lance, on the edge of the couch. Shiro had seen him on his way to the garden, carrying Pidge on his shoulders as the girl gave him directions for a new experiment.

It is a strangely domestic sight, but Shiro welcomed it wholeheartedly. He strides into the room, waving a hand.

"Hey guys, what are you all up to?"

They all look up at him, grinning. Lance spoke up first.

"Shiro! We're teaching Allura how to use earthling slang and so far, she's been a better student than Keith." He teases and Keith sticks out his tongue at him.

"Oh, bite me, most of these phrases don't even make sense half of the time!" He makes a vague movement with his hand and pulls a face. "' _Here come dat boi, o shit, whaddup_ ' What is that even supposed to mean?"

"It's a classic meme, you desert-shack living edgelord of a heathen!" Pidge hurls at him, pointing at Keith with an accusing finger that the boy actually leans back despite the fair bit of distance between the two of them. Lance snorts and Hunk snickers.

"I actually find it quite interesting," Allura pipes up before turning smug. "It's lit."

The Green and Blue Paladin holler in delight as Hunk reaches over for a fist bump, which Allura flawlessly delivers including the finger explosion. Keith rolls his eyes but an amused grin tugs at the corners of his mouth. Shiro chuckles at their antics – thanks to Matt, he knows his fair share of memes and slang, yet, just to annoy his colleague, he instead used them incorrectly every single time just to get a rise out of Matt, who would go on a tangent every single time. It never ceased to amuse Shiro.

And suddenly, an idea pops up in his head. He tries his best to suppress an oncoming mischievous grin and smiles innocently instead.

"That sounds like a lot of fun, or should I say, it's really _bae_!"

Shiro has to pull in all of his willpower not to lose his shit right then and there when he sees the distraught faces of his team. Keith winces.

"What the heck Shiro, even I know that this wasn't correct at all,"

" _Bae_?!" Lance nearly shrieks, looking offended. "Shiro, my man, my dude, captain my captain, this is in no way how one uses the word bae!"

"Not to mention, isn't it already totally outdated?" Hunk asks but recoils a bit when Lance glares at him.

"You take that back!"

"Chill, dude."

"Oh, I see..." Shiro mumbles as if in thought. "How about _Howdy pardner_?"

Pidge starts cackling and now it's Hunk who is pointing at him, looking severely disappointed.

"No," The Yellow Paladin warns Shiro, who bites the inside of his cheek to keep from grinning. "Just, no."

But Shiro just shrugs 'innocently'.

" _U mad bro_?"

That got everyone groaning. Keith buries his face into his hands, suffering from second-hand embarrassment, while Hunk tries to compose himself by taking deep breaths. Lance and Pidge on the other hand, are openly screeching.

"Rage Comics?! Seriously?!"

"Those are so _old_!"

Allura, who had been just recently brought up to date with the internet culture, pinches the bridge of her nose and groans.

"Please stop, you're embarrassing yourself, _Father_!"

Heavy silence settles over the group. Confused by the sudden change of mood, Allura looks up to see everyone staring at her in various degrees of shock. Suddenly, it makes _click!_ in her head and she turns bright red, her altean marks glowing in embarrassment as she turns towards Shiro.

"I– I didn't mean to– I'm sorry, I–" Her stuttering came to a stop when she sees Shiro grinning brightly at her. Then, without missing a beat the Black Paladin opens his mouth:

"Hi Sorry, I'm Shiro!"

The common room _erupted_.

Loose pillows are thrown into Shiro's direction, together with loud booing and indignant shrieks. The man is too busy trying not to fall over from laughing so hard, he can feel tears stinging in his eyes as he let's the pillows pelt him, to notice how Pidge gets up, snatching a pillow before tackling him with a war cry. Shiro lets a small ' _oof_ ' slip before he hauls the small girl over his shoulder, grinning as she screeches. He can vaguely hear Lance yelling _"Pillow Fight!"_  and suddenly Keith barrels into him, big grin on his face as he uses two pillows to beat Shiro up with, who simply reaches out to tickle Keith's side. The boy curls away shrieking, right into Lance and both are sent tumbling to the floor. Pidge manages to get herself out of the man's grip, who only laughs until he feels two pair of hands lifting him off of the floor.

"Hey- what are you–" He doesn't get to finish his sentence when Hunk and Allura joyfully toss him into a mountain of pillows and as soon as Shiro fights himself out of the cushions, he sees the five teenagers flinging themselves onto him. He fumbles shortly on who to catch first, when nearly all of them simultaneously land on him in a heap.

At first, only a few pained groans make their way through the team but Shiro, covered by five teenagers with too much energy, too much sunshine, joy and smiles, Shiro just _laughs_. And one by one, each of them joins in until all of them are wheezing, cackling and crying from laughing way too hard so that their cheeks ache.

_(It's good, great, perfect even. No monsters chasing Shiro down purple-lit corridors, no yellow eyes peering down on him, just him and five kids on a beautiful castle ship, floating in the vast outer space full of adventure and mysteries.)_

After catching their breath, Allura props herself up on her elbows, grinning.

"I assume, that Shiro's phrase must've been a, uhm, _Dad Joke_?"

"Yup," Hunk says through a new round of snickers. "The worst one on that."

Shiro scoffs playfully at that, prodding the boy's side, making him squirm away from his arm. Allura titters.

"I see!" Then, her face falls. "Oh, I can also see why they grow to be irritating."

Shiro boos from underneath them and gets smothered by at least five pillows in turn.

* * *

_**IV**_. They're under heavy fire.

The small city liberation mission has hit a new low; of course at first everything went smoothly, city had been successfully liberated and as they had been celebrating, the very Galra Soldiers they had beaten before came marching back – with numbers. _Big_ numbers.

Now they are left scrambling up the alien citizens left and right, trying to get them to shelter as Keith and Pidge provided open fire from above with their lions. The rest of them still have yet to actually reach their lions. Shiro decapitates a Galra drone with his cybernetic arm, when he sees the Blue Lion soaring through the soft orange skies.

" _Me and Blue are finally up and ready to go!_ " Lance cheers through the helmets as he crushes three Fighters mid-air.  _Three up, two more to go_ , Shiro thinks and soon spots Hunk not far off firing into an oncoming row of drones.

"Lance," The man orders into the communicator while fighting his way towards Hunk. "Can you buy us some time?"

" _Roger that!_ " And not a second later, Blue unleashes her Ice Ray, freezing half of the drone army before she's chased away by oncoming fighters.

The ice won't hold for too long, so as soon as Hunk shoots down the last moving drone, Shiro grabs him by the arm and breaks into a mad dash towards their lions nearby. He can feel Hunk buckle behind him.

"C'mon Hunk, we're almost there-"

Shiro sees the plunging Fighter, immediately turns to cover Hunk when he suddenly finds himself on the ground. Blood and dirt fills his mouth and the explosion rings in his ears. Everything is wonky, he can hear his heart beat in his ears, Hunk _, where is Hunk–_  he sees the Yellow Paladin groggily fighting himself up into a kneeling position. Wincing, Shiro heaves himself up and stumbles towards him, until he watches Hunk yank off his helmet, tossing it onto the ground in front of him.

"Hunk–" Shiro starts as he reaches the boy, who is clutching his head.

" _I can't do this_ ," Taken aback by the panicked outburst, the Black Paladin opens his mouth when Hunk's frantic, out of control breathing reaches his ears. " _I can't do this, I can't– oh my god, I nearly– we nearly died, I- I–_ "

He's _panicking_.

"Hey–" Shiro begins as Hunk begins to sob, rocking back and forth, muttering in his anxiety-ridden state, not noticing Shiro at all. "Hunk– _Hunk_ ,"

" _I can't do this Shiro, we can't do this, there is too many, Shiro, there's too many, Shiro, **Dad** , we're going to die–_" Another explosion goes off in the distance, making the boy jerk in fear. Distantly, Shiro hears Pidge yelling about time running out, but as he rips his own helmet off, he hears nothing. Hunk barely registers the black helmet joining his yellow one, when two hands grasp his head and pull him in, causing his forehead to painfully collide with Shiro's.

Big, teary fawn eyes gaze into stormy, yet calm grey ones.

" _Hunk_ ," Shiro says, clear and calm like the sea before a storm. " _It's gonna be okay_."

_(Cold fear that Shiro knows all too well spreads like an ugly sickness in Hunk's eyes. Eyes so bright and young, too young to be out here, to be fighting in an intergalactic war like that, and for oh so many times, Shiro has to ask himself; why. Why these kids, why them, they shouldn't be here, they are too young.)_

"Hunk, I promise you, we'll make it out of here, okay?" He squeezes the boy's face as proof. "We'll make it out of here no matter what, do you understand? I know you're scared and that's okay, Hunk, because I'm here, see?"

And even as fights surround them, as laser bullets shoot above them, as explosions shift the ground underneath their knees, Shiro smiles at him through the sweat and dirt and blood, that flows from the small laceration on his right temple. Hunk whimpers and grips Shiro's wrists like a lifeline.

"I'm here Hunk, and I will do anything, _anything_ to get you out of here safe and sound, so don't worry and breathe with me, Hunk, I need you to breathe with me." The man inhales, encouraging the boy to copy him and they cycle through this process a few times. Hunk squeezes his eyes shut before finally exhaling deeply through his nose.

"Okay," He croaks, still visibly shaken but when he opens his eyes, Shiro finds new fire in them. " _Okay, let's do this_."

The leader smiles, bringing his hands down to clutch Hunk's shoulders, determination clear.

"We've got this."

It seems like a promise.

A promise Hunk definitely kept when he shot down the oncoming drones behind Shiro when they reached their lions – it was thoroughly celebrated after the battle through a victory cuddle pile.

* * *

**_V_**. Shiro is _livid_.

Irritation itches under his skin and he can feel the ugly yell that sits waiting in his throat, ready to rain down on Keith, who pointedly glares at the floor of the hallway outside of the infirmary, arms crossed defensively in front of him. The leader exhales heavily through his nose.

"I have never, _ever_ , been this disappointed in you, Keith."

Keith mouth twitches downwards, but he keeps quiet.

"Not only have you ignored direct orders from a plan that we _all_  had previously agreed on, but you also compromised the mission _and_  put all of your teammates into jeopardy by detaching yourself from the plan and run head-on into danger to the point where the whole building collapsed and therefore making us lose all possibly valuable information of the Galra Empire."

Keith whips his head up, furious, as he starts to yell.

"The building wouldn't have collapsed if _Lance_ -"

" _Lance_  saved _your_ life after _you_ decided to go on a suicide mission, which left _him_  in a cryopod, which he is still in _now_!"

With every word, Shiro's voice grew louder and louder as he let his anger slip through until he was yelling at the boy in front of him. Keith took it silently, but Shiro could see the way he clenches his hands around his biceps and the range of emotions his eyes display – _anger, guilt, panic, fear, frustration_. The man screws his eyes shut when the telltale sting of a headache pulses between his temples and brings his hand up to pinch the bridge of his nose. Tense silence stretches on between them.

"Listen, Keith," The tired tone makes the boy look up and suddenly, Shiro's face seems so much _older_ , exhaustion and stress carved into his face like wrinkles. Immediately, Keith feels bad. "I'm sorry I yelled at you, I know I'm angry, but I shouldn't have done that. I'm just–"

Shiro sighs tiredly and Keith's shoulders sag guiltily.

"I'm– We, all of us, we were so worried when you ran off. You could've gotten killed and no amount of useful Galra information would be worth it. All I'm asking for is for you to just consider the other people or- or– at least the plan we worked on together–"

Shiro isn't sure what he's doing anymore as he tries to find the words but cannot find any, instead he just combs a hand through his hair and let's it rest on the back of his neck. He gazes down on Keith, who averts his tired gaze. Shiro remembers those eyes – angry eyes on an angry face of an angry boy, whose aura radiated rebellion and bottled-up fury. It wasn't always that way, Shiro has seen many faces of Keith; the happy face with the happy smile as he presented Shiro with the confirmation letter of the Garrison, the sad face with the sad frown when Keith realised he was failing classes – Shiro knows this boy, and he knows this boy has come a long way.

"I'm sorry."

The Black Paladin blinks.

"Wha–"

"I said; I'm sorry, okay?" Keith mumbles angrily, his eyes still glued to the floor. "I know I screwed up big time, so I'm sorry."

"I–" Shiro starts helplessly, fumbling a bit. "Well, thank you? I mean, for apologising, but that seems a little harsh, don't–"

Suddenly, he is met with blazing purple eyes.

"I _screwed_ up, Shiro, okay? I know I did, I thought I had it all under control, but I didn't, so I tried to make do but look what happened; Lance gets stuck into cyropod for me and _because_ of me! Tell me, which part _isn't_ something I didn't screw up," Keith spits, fury and hurt evident in his voice. "I'm a screw-up, Shiro, haven't you noticed already? It has been clear since the day I was put in that goddamn foster home! And then in another, an in another and so on!"

At this point, Keith is yelling again, but this time Shiro isn't very sure if it is still about the whole mission thing. For a moment, Shiro realises that Keith's unfurling – suddenly, there is so much pouring out of this boy, the angry boy from the foster home, the boy who was always covered in band-aids and bruises, the boy that always trailed behind Shiro, the boy Shiro watched grow up with him.

"Whatever good thing I had, I'd always break it, but then– but then there was _you_ and it finally looked like everything's gonna be fine like you always said, ' _It's gonna be okay_ ' and really thought that I would be okay- I made it into the Garrison! Like who would've known someone like me would actually make it into the Garrison, but you believed, so I did too and everything was looking up, everything was good an then– and then–"

Keith trails off, but his mouth keeps on moving around soundless words, anger, frustration, and hurt seeping out of him and for once, Shiro actually _sees_ Keith. Sees the scared, lonely boy from the foster home with too much sadness in his tiny body, who didn't understand why all this was happening to him, and then, all this sadness turned into red hot anger.

Shiro's heart aches.

Gently, he settles a hand on Keith's shoulder and the boy stills under it. Finally, he lifts his gaze – _hurt, loneliness, the feeling of being lost with no where to_.

"And then...you were _gone_." The Red Paladin says quietly. "You were gone, Shiro, just. _Gone_. And everyone pretended like you never existed, everyone said it was mistake made by the pilot, but _you_ were the pilot so I knew it wasn't true but– but they told me you were _dead_."

_(Keith remembers that day in Iverson's office, a week after the announcement was made of the failure of the Kerberos mission. A week of sleepless nights and constantly questioning the school's faculty for anything, anything about the mission. He remembers standing there, quietly shaking with barely concealed rage as he demanded for an answer that Iverson wouldn't give him. Shiro was not dead. He couldn't be._

_"He's dead, cadet, how many times to I have to tell you?"_

_Lies._

_"He's dead."_

_All lies._

_"Takashi Shirogane is dead."_

_With an enraged roar Keith launched himself over Iverson's desk, ignored the orders thrown at him from his superiors, ignored the hands that tried to claw him off Iverson, all he could see was red as he brought his fist down with one question on his tongue, yelling it out over and over agin._

_"WHERE IS MY BROTHER?!")_

"I didn't want to believe it," Keith mumbles under his breath so that Shiro nearly misses it. "I didn't want to believe that– that the last piece of what I considered family, that I lost that too..."

The last part barely makes it out when a small, choked sob follows. His shoulders are quaking under Shiro's hand as he grips that hand with his own as if he's afraid that if he'd let go, it will forever slip away. Shiro wants to say something, anything, wants to say so much and yet, there is nothing he can say. So instead of talking, he guides Keith gently into his arms and hugs the boy – the boy too young for the amount of emotions in his heart, this heart so big and carrying so much. And for once, the anger turns into sorrow.

They stand there for a while, Shiro hugging and soothing, Keith clinging and apologising with every breath he takes. It feels familiar, Shiro thinks and then he sees himself, younger with an even younger Keith, who is crying into Shiro's shoulder, clinging while Shiro is soothing. Maybe...maybe not everything has changed so much.

After Keith has calmed down and dried his eyes, not without batting off Shiro's affectionate hair ruffling with a small smile, they enter the infirmary, where they nearly walk into Hunk. They recoil.

"Oh, there you are!" Hunk says and eyes Keith for a bit – if he noticed his red rimmed eyes, he certainly didn't comment on it. "I was just abut to get you guys, look who's back from the almost-dead!"

The Red Paladin tries not to flinch too much at the phrasing but looks over to Lance anyway, who is sitting on the stairs with a blanket over his shoulders, laughing at something Coran and Pidge say. When their eyes meet, Keith gulps but then sees Lance smiling at him.

"What's up, Mullethead! Already thought I'd get to see you in a pod, but looks like you got lucky, you soggy cornflake leftover!" Lance teases and Keith can't help but roll his eyes at that, smiling slightly all the while.

"Good to see you too, Lance," He says as he makes his way over, only stopping short in front of his teammate and bringing up a hand to scratch the back of his neck uneasily.

"Listen...I wanted to apologise. For putting you, all of you in danger." Keith then gives Lance a small smile. "Also, thanks. For saving my butt out there."

Shiro looks on, content with the development and chuckles a bit when Hunk pulls Keith into a massive bear hug while Lance and Pidge holler something with their usual vigor. He turns to Allura, questions about Lance's wellbeing on his tongue, when he hears it:

"No problem, Knife Boy," Lance crows while keeping Keith in a playful headlock. "The great _Lancey Lance_ will be anyone's hero, even for _Drop Outs_ like you!"

Shiro turns around so fast, Pidge is sure that he must've experienced some sort of whiplash as she and Hunk cling to each other fearfully at his reaction and only now, Lance belatedly notices how pale Keith has gone. Shiro looms over them.

"You did _**what**_ –"

* * *

**_VI_**. This is a good plan. A very good one, and Shiro honestly hopes and prays to God, any God, that this will work.

Destroying Zarkon and his reign once and for all, it certainly is a very enticing thought, not to mention they are very close to actually putting this plan into action. Shiro isn't sure how to feel right now; he is most definitely worried, and yet strangely excited? More like antsy, because there is this big question that haunts Shiro - _will this really work?_

He hopes so.

His thoughts are interrupted when he hears the doors swishing open behind him as Coran strides onto the Front Deck, tablet in hand, studying something on it. When he notices Shiro however, he lowers the gadget.

"Oh why hello, Shiro!" He greets, chipper as ever. "Didn't see ya there for a second, still brooding over the plan, I see?"

He chuckles as he watches Shiro pull a face, akin to a small pout.

"I don't brood..." Shiro mumbles petulantly, but he joins Coran at the dashboard anyway. Maybe some company would get his mind off before he gets stir crazy.

He watches with mild curiosity how Coran enters a few numbers and altean letters onto a few screens, humming inquisitively all the while as his eyes switch from the tablet to the wider screens. A few buttons light up and Shiro can't help but reach out slowly for them, curious on what they do, when a swift slap to his hand makes him recoil with a startled yelp.

Coran wags a finger at him.

"Nu-uh-uh! No touchy!" The Altean chastises the man as if he's dealing with a toddler instead. "By stars, if you had pressed any of these, you could've blown us all to bits!"

Shiro's eyes go wide at that. It's...a very concerning thought. Coran clicks his tongue.

"For someone who is regularly seen as a father-figure by everyone, you certainly don't show it right now."

It's more of an off-hand comment, as Coran turns his attention back onto the dashboard, while Shiro blinks.

"I– wait, father-figure?" Shiro questions, when it suddenly hits him. "Oh..."

Coran looks amused for a second.

"Confusing, not? Don't you worry, you're doing great so far, we Space Parents got to stick together!"

A chuckle found itself a way out of Shiro's mouth at that.

"Space Parents? I mean, I get the 'Space' thing, but 'Parents'?"

Twirling his moustache between his fingers, Coran proudly turns to face him.

"Well, I certainly have my own part too with this ragtag family, and seen that we're the only adults here, we might as well be Husbands at this point." He announces and Shiro actually winces a little.

"I get the logic, Coran, but...don't get me wrong, I just don't think the 'Husband' thing will work." The Paladin grins sheepishly and he hears Coran snicker good-naturedly.

"Ah, of course not," The Altean turns back to the dashboard, eyes crinkling softly at the edges. "Kind of slipped out of me a bit since you remind me so much of _him_."

Taken aback by the man next to him, Shiro regards him with a curious, yet sympathetic look. Then, he remembers all the sleepless nights he spent wandering around in the castle, where he occasionally caught Coran looking out into the vast depth of space, face looking forlorn as he stood in his usual stance, just looking. Watching. Maybe waiting.

For a person who could never return to him.

_(Shiro remembers, the day he travelled back to the Garrison, his vacation turning to an end, packing his bags as his mother helped._

_"So, Takashi," She began, something sly in her voice. "When will you bring a potential spouse home?"_

_Shiro spluttered at that, letting go of the neatly folded pile of clothes in his grasp._

_"Mother, why would you– I mean– Why bring that up now?" He asked, pink dusting his cheeks as he picked up his fallen clothes while his mother chuckled._

_"Oh you know, just wondering," She mused. "You are a fine young man, I made sure of that."_

_Shiro rolled his eyes at that and snickered when his mother lightly smacked his arm for that._

_"As I was saying; I just hope you won't wait too long, or else you'll end up as grey and old as me." She joked, gently closing one of her son's suitcases._

_"Nonsense, Mother!" Shiro said, smiling at her. "You're just as gorgeous as ever, so don't you worry about that."_

_She laughed, before kissing his cheek affectionately and then ruffling his hair._

_"Stay charming like that, the right person might come along then, Takashi.")_

A small smile makes it's way onto Shiro's lips. He then turns to Coran, making a curious sound.

"Like me? He must've been a very charming man." He snickers when Coran gives him a surprised look. Bu then, he smiles.

"Oh yes, very," He chuckles. "And not to mention an absolute klutz! So you're not far off!"

"Hey!"

* * *

**_0_**. He can feel himself floating.

Flying.

Floating.

He's not sure.

Distantly, he can hear Coran and Allura's frantic calls. He tries to answer but no words escape his mouth. They fought Zarkon. They won.

Right?

His lion rumbles deep within his mind, and suddenly there is a foreign sensation, like something is pulling him.

"...no..."

He gasps and weakly tries to reach for his seat. His hand only grasps air.

"... _no_..."

The sensation grows stronger, yet Shiro struggles. Trying to get free. His lion rumbles again, but he won't listen. He can't.

"Please..." He pleads, begs, anything that could make him stay. "Please, _please_...don't..."

_(There is Pidge with her crooked grin, looking sheepish as she pushes up the glasses on her nose)_

"Please..."

_(Hunk waves his hands around excitedly, eyes bright like the smile on his face)_

"They–"

_I–_

_(Rain falls and Lance is dancing through the water, soaked to the bone and yet, the big, happy smile never wavers)_

"They–"

_I–_

_(A Gladiator falls to its knees, red sword deeply wedged into its chest while Keith pumps his fist, grinning victoriously)_

"Need..."

_Need–_

_(Four different braids bounce along Allura's head as she laughs, spinning around in a floating chair)_

"They...need–"

_I Need–_

_(Coran twirls his moustache between his fingers, looking proud as he chuckles)_

"They need me..."

_I Need Them._

_Don't take them away from me._

_Please._

_Don't take my family away from me._

His heart aches, aches so much as he watches those smiles vanish in pitch black darkness.

And then, Shiro falls.

* * *

 

_He's gone._

 

**Author's Note:**

> if yall listen closely ya can hear me crying over Space Dad lmao i'm a mess


End file.
